The Anxious Generation: Are We Failing Our Teens and Young Adults?

By Daniel Wathen | Learn Chat Share Podcast

Teen mental health is more than a trending headline—it’s a full-blown cultural shift, and it’s happening fast. In a recent episode of Learn Chat Share, I sat down with my friend Erin, a licensed mental health professional working in high schools, to unpack what’s going on. Inspired by Jonathan Haidt’s powerful book The Anxious Generation: The Great Rewiring, we explored why teens and young adults are more anxious, overwhelmed, and disconnected than ever—and what we can actually do about it.

Mental Health Fluency vs. Mental Health Resilience

Today’s teens are more fluent in mental health terminology than any generation before. They can talk openly about anxiety, depression, ADHD, and even more complex diagnoses like complex PTSD. But having the words doesn’t mean they have the tools.

“Our kids have so much language with mental health… but I would say they have a huge increase in anxiety.”

Teens today are absorbing mental health information through TikToks, Instagram posts, and Google searches, which means they’re often diagnosing themselves without professional guidance. That creates a strange paradox: they know what they’re feeling, but may lack the emotional skills or real-world support to do anything about it. Awareness is only half the equation—resilience must be taught, modeled, and practiced.

What Happens When Kids Don’t Climb Trees

 As a Gen X parent, I remember being told to “come home when the streetlights come on.” That kind of independence is rare today, and it’s taking a toll on our kids. We don’t let them take risks anymore—not physical, not emotional, and not social.

“They’re scared of everything… Is it because we didn’t let them climb trees when they were seven?”

Risky play is how kids learn boundaries, gain confidence, and develop problem-solving skills. But in our efforts to keep them safe, we may be stunting their growth. When children aren’t allowed to test limits, make mistakes, and fall (literally or metaphorically), they may arrive at adolescence and early adulthood unprepared to deal with the real world.

The Digital Dilemma: Social Media and Dopamine Addiction

Phones have become an extension of the self—especially for teens. Platforms are designed to hijack the brain’s reward system with endless scrolls, likes, and dopamine-triggering alerts. The comparison culture, peer validation, and digital bullying add another layer of stress.

“Our reward system was not being lit up like a Christmas tree the way that our teenagers are.”

Meanwhile, real-life social skills are atrophying. Teens are awkward about hugging, anxious about eye contact, and uncomfortable with casual conversation—because many of them don’t practice it anymore. Erin emphasized the science behind this: eye contact, hugs, and physical proximity produce oxytocin, the bonding hormone our brains crave—but social media doesn’t deliver that. It fakes connection without providing the neurological or emotional benefits.

The New Failure to Launch

What’s happening to young adults between 18 and 27? More are living at home, unemployed, and unsure of their next steps. It’s not laziness—it’s paralysis rooted in fear, perfectionism, and a lack of emotional tools.

“They think they have to have their whole life planned. They’re mistake-averse, risk-averse, and scared of everything.”

Many feel like they’ve already failed before they’ve begun. Plan A didn’t work, but they don’t have a Plan B. Instead of pivoting, they freeze—believing they’re broken or that the system is rigged. When we don’t allow kids to stumble and recover in early life, they arrive at adulthood without the muscle memory for resilience. As Erin put it: “They’re having a hard time… having a hard time.”

So, What Can We Do?

There’s no one-size-fits-all solution—but there are hopeful, practical steps we can take. It starts with allowing our kids to experience struggle and challenge in safe, meaningful ways. That means more unsupervised play, fewer screens, and greater trust in their ability to problem-solve.

✅ Encourage risky play and let kids build real-world problem-solving skills.

✅ Set boundaries around screen time and model healthy tech use.

✅ Advocate for age-verified social media access—just like we did with cigarettes.

✅ Teach coping skills through honest conversation, not just curated Instagram quotes.

✅ Promote resilience over perfection in schools and at home.

“Legislation has to change. Just like we moved the cigarette industry out of targeting kids, we need to do the same for social media.”

We can’t rely solely on parents or schools—tech companies and lawmakers need to take responsibility too. Just as we once fought Big Tobacco, it’s time to hold social platforms accountable for their impact on youth mental health.

Hope Is Not Lost

If there’s one thing this conversation left me with, it’s hope. Teens are talking. They’re searching. They’re trying. And when given the right tools, they’re capable of deep empathy, strength, and connection.

“Neuroplasticity means we can always change. So it’s not hopeless for the youth of today… It’s hard, but not impossible.”

Parents of teenagers today have the power to change the narrative—and so will the teens who become parents themselves. The next generation is watching and learning. If we’re brave enough to lead with empathy and structure, they’ll follow with resilience and purpose.

🎧 Listen to the full episode here: Spotify, Apple Podcast, Youtube